Sunday, December 01, 2013

Newest reality show concept



I want to pitch this one.

I am *so* tired of hearing how group X wants to secede from the Union.  Here's the latest I've run across.  Can't control the eye-rolls on this one.

http://valleywag.gawker.com/silicon-valleys-ultimate-exit-is-a-fantasy-of-seceding-1449199349

I propose a new reality show. "Start Your Own Nirvana".  Each month, some new group of starry-eyed Libertarians/Liberals/Conservatives/Technologists/whatnot can vie for their chance to start their own society.  It would be very-much like Survivor.  The whole lot of them are dumped into some random location and live-broadcasted as they all work together to form a new country.  They'll start from the beginning: they'll all be given knives (hey, we're not completely heartless here) and a crew to video them.  Let the nation-building begin!

What every one of these "we're gonna secede" idiots blatantly fail to acknowledge is that the most expensive part of starting their own country is the air-fare to go there.  Hell, I seem to recall a certain group of Kool-Aid loving personality-cultists who had no trouble obtaining their own slice of heaven from Guyana.  Doubt they paid much for it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonestown

I'm sure there are other large swathes of real-estate available in hell-holes such as Mexico, South America, Africa and Texas.

Think of the ratings!  After several months, you'd have multiple "Freedom Countries" going strong all over the globe.  Think of the advertising!  Hell, the Freedom Countries could gain revenue by selling advertising rights to simply view their glorious successes.  Before too long, the world would be dotted with new-found whateverinthefuck these 14-y.o. dreamers are yammering about.

Fuck Survivor.  This would be the REAL reality TV.

It would also move these idiots from my news feeds onto the reality TV stations I never watch.  Win-win.

Saturday, October 05, 2013

Destroying the Village in Order to Save It

So if I can paraphrase the logic of the Government Shutdown, Congress's argument goes something like this:
"The debt is getting out of hand due to out-of-control spending by Congress (i.e. "Us"). The long-term consequence of this irresponsibility will be that the Government will run out of money and fail (i.e. "Close").
In order to prevent this catastrophe, we, Congress, are shutting the government down now in order to save the country from the pain, suffering and misery of living without a government."
So, in other words, only by stopping those that would shut down the government can we stop the people who have shut down the government. But considering that this whole brouhaha is generated by the people whose job it is to prevent all this from happening in the first place, why are they the only ones not suffering the consequences of this?

If we turn to the first tool of figuring out government (Follow the Money), our real question should be, "Who's benefiting most from the government shutdown?" Obviously Congress itself is high on the list, but who else?

Thursday, October 03, 2013

The old "Shutting Down the Government" game

Once again, Congress is playing with "Shutting Down the Government".  This take on Karaoke theater follows closely to the old, "We Couldn't Pass a Budget" classic.

This gave me an idea:  Since we hire Congress to run (specifically, run the finances of) The Government, I propose that if at any time The Government

A) Is closed due to a lack of funding
B) The Budget is not passed by deadline

all members of Congress be declared in violation of the law and immediately imprisoned.

But that was a stupid idea.  A co-worker had a much better one.  In case of A or B above, Congress would be declared in dereliction of its duty and fired - never to be allowed to run for public office again.  New elections would be held immediately.


Yeah, I know, this would put us much closer to a Parliamentary style of government.  Yeah I know, to get even close to this would require an amendment to the Constitution.  But it sure is fun to fantasize.

If you have any other good reasons why this wouldn't work, keep them to yourself.  Or put it politely in the comments.  Either one.