Thursday, May 11, 2006

Bush Gumball of Wisdom

I can't praise Get Your War On enough:

"You think just because the words are garbled in his mouth, they're garbled in his mind?"

"Hell yes they're garbled in his mind! His mind is like one of those spinning cages where you pull out the winning lottery numbers--but there's only four goddamn little balls in his cage: "Freedom", "Democracy", "Terror" and "Stay the Course." He opens his mouth , one of the balls drops out. That's not a conversation, that's Keno."

This metaphor makes me think of another one: You know, those giant gumball machines that sit atop a tall, transparent pedestal? Bush supporters borrow money from their grandchildren, put the money in the Bush Gumball Machine and a stand fixated as a nugget of "wisdom" spirals round and round toward the floor. Once there, it jumps out of the little hatch and skitters across the floor underneath the cigarette dispenser. The Bushies gleefully snatch up the Gumball Of Wisdom and immediately pop it into their mouth, ready to show to anyone at the least provication.

Two seconds later, the flavor runs out and they're stuck there, feeling like an idiot for spending their last quarter on such short-lasting enjoyment. Next second, they're stealing more money from their grandchildren, again plunging it into the Bush Gumball Machine, dropping the previous drooling 'wisdom' unceremoniously to the floor -- where it waits for someone else to clean up the sticky mess.

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